“I essentially had three personalities: ‘Student Naheem’, ‘Neighborhood Naheem’, and myself… and it hurt that I spent a majority of the day not being myself.”
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Poly Prep Country Day School (Brooklyn, NY) on the surface was an academic paradise. Teachers were immensely knowledgeable and cared more about genuine learning rather than standardized tests. The school provided its students with every opportunity to participate in any sport and activity at an extremely high level. However, for many of the school’s few minority students, there was a much more troubling story when looked at more closely.
At Poly, I was often ashamed of my upbringing and the neighborhood where I was born. I feared that my peers would see me as the “Affirmative Action Admit”. I opted out of the football weekend carpool so that no one would see where I lived. I often used the money that my parents had given me for breakfast and lunch to buy sneakers. I even borrowed clothes from friends to create the illusion of a more extensive wardrobe. I minimized my athletic accomplishments so that others would not view me as the typical jock.
In my neighborhood, peers often ridiculed me because I valued my education. I battled the ‘nerd’ image that others castigated upon me by publicly denigrating the value of an education while I secretly did my homework. I told my peers that I only attended my school because of its athletic reputation and not for the quality education that it provided. I essentially had three personalities, “Student Naheem”, “Neighborhood Naheem” and myself; and it hurt that I spent a majority of the day not being myself.
I was forced to become a different person at home than I was at school. For example, in my neighborhood I needed to be resolute to avoid the pitfalls that many talented people from similar upbringings had fallen. In school, I needed to be resolute because I often dealt with people who felt that I did not belong. Being resolute in the Canarsie section of Brooklyn was not the same as being resolute within the confines of Poly Prep. One situation may have called for me to defend myself loudly, while the other would have required my quiet strength to ignore an inappropriate comment. Though I needed to use the same character trait in both environments, that trait assumed a different meaning in the context of the environment. Regardless of the scale of the shift between “personalities”, it was painful to feel that I was constantly not being true to myself.
Eventually I became comfortable at Poly. The intellectual curiosity that Poly breeds forces students to value each other for their opinions and backgrounds rather than to tease them. Poly taught me that I should value my experiences because they helped to create the person that I am today. Without Poly, I am sure that I would not have been as successful as I currently am.
- Naheem Harris
Information Manager,
NYC Department of Small Business Services
